The Squirrel Chronicles

There is a creepy, creepy man who lives in the apartment below me. He only goes out in the wee hours of the morning for 20 minute intervals. He does not work. He has a webcam in his window. The windows are all completely covered in tin foil, except where the webcam is placed. The windows are closed at ALL TIMES, even in the sticky, 90 degree humidity of mid August.
I have lived here a year and a half and I have only seen him twice.

Today there is a horrid stench emanating from his apartment, and permeating our shared entranceway.
It is a combination of egg salad and scorched popcorn.

The effect is absolutely nauseating. The smell is beginning to waft into my apartment from under the front door.
I have opened all my windows (depsite the 19 degree temps) and lit every candle I can find. Let's hope whatever it is he's concocting down there isn't flammable.....

Why is Britney Spears dumber than a doornail?
WHY???
What is UP with driving your FOUR MONTH OLD around in your LAP?
Good god.
I am not a parent, but I sure as hell know that if a paparazzi hit my car, then that airbag would MOST CERTAINLY SUFFOCATE MY CHILD.
HELLO!?

I guess it's true....Just because you have a child, it doesn't make you a parent.

Last week, Juan had strep throat.
Two days later, MY throat started hurting.
The doctor put me on heavy duty antibiotics before the symptoms got any worse.

That damn penicillin can wreak some havoc on one's intestines.
Fer reals.
My new nickname around the house is:
"My little farting machine" (pronounced with a thick puerto rican accent, no less)

Sigh.
All I can do now is wait for the yeast infection.